The ‘Wounded Man-Boy™’ Meme

There is this argument that players are broken, wounded man-boys™. That they are damaged men exercising their ‘demons’, and easing ‘trauma’ by sleeping with lots of different women.

Meanwhile, the ‘real man™’, the true, strong alpha, commits to one woman and ‘settles down™’ because he is strong enough to do so.

In this way the player is deftly rendered ‘weak’ by the trad con. Because if he was ‘whole’ (i.e. not damaged) then he would have no need to chase girls for shallow, superficial sex. Instead, he would be ‘doing the right thing™’—marrying, building a family, and probably growing a beard at the same time.

At first sight this might seem reasonable to some. After all, aren’t we always told by the mainstream media that the ‘healthy’ thing to do is to ‘settle down™’, get married and all of that jazz?

Well, yes—we are told that. We’re told it by pretty much every authority figure that we encounter throughout the course of our lives: parents, schools, priests, the government (who offer tax break incentives for married couples), romantic movies, songs, etc.

We are brainwashed all the way down the line by message after message promoting romantic love, marriage, ‘good family values’. 

In fact, it you are a trad con you really have very little left to do, since the heavy lifting as regards your ideas is already done for you by very powerful factions in society.

And because the message is that ‘monogamy, wife and kids’ is ‘good’; while ‘player with a constantly-rotating harem’ is ‘bad’, it doesn’t take a lot of work to reinforce it.

Fine. But just because there is a system in place that the majority follow doesn’t mean it’s the ‘right’ system for all. And just because some people choose a different path, it doesn’t mean they are defective or ‘degenerate’.

Because here’s the thing: men love sex. A lot of sex. With a lot of different women. This is simply a fact. It shouldn’t be controversial to anyone on the planet.

So to claim that someone who seeks out lots of sex (or, let’s be real, continues to seek it out after they’ve hit a certain age) is ‘degenerate’ makes zero sense.

Isn’t such a man merely following his biological imperative, after all?

It could be argued that the man (or woman) who submits to enforced monogamy is the one who is being ‘unnatural’, since he is going against his biological programming and entering into an arrangement that ties him down and stops him (theoretically) from fucking more women.

The ‘wounded man-boy™’ meme is yet another attempt by the joyless, moralising do-gooders to smear the playboy, to make him appear ‘less than’ the upstanding family man. But it’s meaningless.

Yes, some playboys may have had traumatic backgrounds. I personally didn’t have the greatest family background. My parents divorced when I was seven. My father soon remarried, but I had a fairly poor relationship with my stepmother.

Has this affected the way that I see marriage and relationships? Without any doubt. How could it not?

But I’ve ‘worked on’ those negative feelings, going to counselling and so on in the past (you can read all about this in my book 10X Happiness) and I can honestly say that I’m in a pretty good place right now.

And of course, I don’t live in a bubble. It’s not as though my own personal history is the only thing that colours my ideas about intimacy. I also have friends, family and colleagues who are married, or have been married, or who are in the process of divorce. And through them (plus the countless guys that I coach and counsel online) I have a very good idea of how the land lies.

Sex

But above all of that, the reason that a player chases new girls, and covets novel sexual experiences is not because he is ‘broken’, but simply because he really likes sex. Why should that be so hard to understand or believe?

There is no logical reason to say that someone is ‘broken’ for not entering an arrangement (monogamy) which fails more often than it succeeds.

In fact, the playboy is a pragmatist. He looks at the available evidence, sees relationships for what they are—a shaky bet that in any case run counter to his biology—and he looks for an alternative instead.

Open Relationships

Precisely what alternative he selects is another matter. There are people in long-term marriages who have a little extra fun on the side, either with or without their partners’ knowledge.

Then there are those who have open relationships. Blackdragon calls these OLTRs (open long-term relationship).

Or you can adopt the renegade playboy lifestyle where you have a series of mini-relationships, or even concurrent non-monogamous relationships with women in different cities around the world.

Affection

An important point to understand is that just because you are opting not to settle into strict monogamy doesn’t mean that your life is entirely bereft of intimacy and affection. Quite the opposite—those things are absolutely necessary for everyone.

But while the trad con thinks OK, I like this girl so let’s get legally married and stay together for the next 50 years!; the playboy is more pragmatic, understanding that both his non-monogamous nature and the girl’s means that this was likely never intended to last forever.

And so he plans accordingly.

You can currently buy all 8 of my game / dating books in a bundle called The Renegade Dating Blueprint for just $47 (reduced from $69) here.

And you can also check out the brand-new course by kickboxing champion, multi-millionaire playboy with a harem of 7 girls Andrew Tate, called How To Get Girls.

Forget all the soy crap written by purple pill coaches online and find out how a real G does it.

To read more about modern dating, go here.