Tinder is always a shit show—or at least, it’s a shit show enough of the time to almost make it not worth the hassle.
As Alex Forrest said when I interviewed him for my podcast last week, it’s not the best method for delivering one’s value. And the problem with that is that the girls that one attracts through it as a result can often (not always) be inferior to those one meets in real life.
And when she turns up, and she’s more homely than her pictures suggested, but she’s taken an Uber all the way into town, and she’s got all dressed up for the occasion, then you kinda have to go through with it.
And yet . . . it’s difficult to go on a date when you have little interest in the other person. It’s a bit like trying to sing a song passionately when it’s not to your taste: you can probably go through the motions, but it will be inauthentic.
In these circumstances it can be necessary to pay greater attention to one’s surroundings than normal to prevent boredom and irritability from setting in. And so I enjoyed the interior of the lounge bar in Kiev immensely.
A massive Buddha smiled down over the proceedings. Giant garlands of flowers were festooned overhead. A huge, faux-Chinese vamp picture hung over the main hall. The seats were covered with red velvet. The DJ played beautiful, exotic house music. And two hookers stood forlornly by the bar, looking at the diminishing pool of customers.
One thing about Kiev (or Kiev during the week, at least) is how empty parts of it is. Earlier on I’d entered a very upscale shopping mall on five floors—there can’t have been more than ten people browsing in the whole place. The lounge bar was much the same. How the places remain open is beyond me.
Still, the establishment was an ideal date venue—if you can only find an ideal date. Sexy, smoky, red-lit and mysterious, with comfortable sofas, it has everything you need for a perfect evening.
I couldn’t help thinking of the Bond movie Skyfall, or perhaps it was Spectre—the lush interior of a smoky upscale bar somewhere at the end of the earth, in a location that only The Economist would cover in any depth.
In any case, if you are in Kiev and you want to impress a girl, head for Buddha.
More from the frontline tomorrow.
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