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Lazy Girls Can Be Hot But They Need To Get Motivated And Do Something

lazy girls

lazy girl

I have been thinking a lot recently about what it takes to ‘live the life’ – the life, that is, of a guy committed to meeting and seducing  a succession of new women. There’s a lot to consider: what proportion of one’s time should be spent on the hunt; how sustainable it is long term; at what point should one ‘cash in’ and try a relationship (if at all). The problem that I face – and I suspect that this may apply to other guys too – is that due to time constraints I frequently have one foot in and one foot out of the game.

On the one hand, nothing appeals to me more than the idea of a succession of hook-ups with hot young women. I am a libertarian at heart, and I find convention stifling. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with long-term relationships but I find them difficult for a number of reasons. I’ve had three so far – each with cool girls, with whom I shared great times. But temperamentally the set-up is not for me. My focus is on my work and on writing (both for this and other blogs, as well as my novels, which are my main project.)

Hook-ups require work. In The 7 Laws of Seduction I recommend that guys approach 100 women in a month. This is something I still do myself from time to time: it gets the motor running, sharpens up your social skills, gives you incredible momentum and will hopefully yield some good prospects for sex. But let’s be honest  — interacting with a hundred strangers takes time and emotional energy. And that’s before you get into the funnel of dating and seducing. Meeting up with the girl, if only for a maximum of two drinks (recommended), prepping her for sex, dealing with her bullshit, getting her into a cab and back to your apartment, handling last-minute resistance then finally fucking her: all of this takes a lot of time, tenacity and energy. On top of my full-time job, my side projects, exercising and socialising the process takes its toll.

There is a lot of information out there on how to meet girls and get them into bed. Less discussed is what to do when you’ve got past that point and you’re attempting to juggle the women you meet with your work-life — which, as we often emphasise on sites for men, should be your primary focus. I scratch the surface in an article I wrote for Return of Kings about how to run a harem, but I think there’s a lot more to be said and it’s something I intend to come back to in the future.

All of this came to a head for me at the weekend when B stayed over at my flat. I’ve been seeing B since the beginning of the year, and she has become my primary girl almost by default, although she is hot, scoring well against all my personal requirements: twenty three, very slim, long legs, long hair, great facial bone structure, Polish.

B stayed with me on Saturday night. B woke up feeling lazy on Sunday morning. B called up her waitress job and told them she had a temperature. I want to stay here with you. Fine, baby, but I need to work. That’s OK — I won’t disturb you. 


I sat down at the computer. I am editing a novel at the moment — a process which requires concentration and, ideally, solitude. B lay in bed and ate toast. B painted her toenails. B called a friend and had an animated ten minute conversation in Polish. B watched an episode of Gossip Girl. Finally, B had a crying jag and told me she couldn’t trust me.

The ‘alpha’ response to this: you should have kicked that bitch out the house. Money over bitches, bro — never let a girl come before your work. Etc. True. But life is rarely that simple. There are two issues here. First — the majority of the women that I come into contact with actually do very little with their lives. Second — unless you’re a complete psychopath (and yeah, I know hot chicks dig ‘dark triad’ shit, but let’s be real here) there is in every scenario a calculation to be made about how much you tolerate and how much you push back on without being a dick.

Most people are aimless. As Will Self says in a recent essay, a vast majority of [their] time is spent undertaking work that has little human or spiritual value. They are consumers, not producers. They watch sports. They watch box sets. They discuss the  box sets on social media. They update Instagram. They obsess over celebrities. They drink. They take drugs. They have a good time, superficially, but their lives have little substance. Put simply, they have nothing to do.


I meet girls in shopping malls and in discos and in man-made pleasure resorts like Ibiza — twenty-first century locales of superficiality. They are filled with people — women and men — who have nothing to do. The problem is that I do have things to do — I am merely visiting, dipping in, following the demands of my biological imperative. The girls I meet, who I become intimate with (they spend the night with me; we wake together in my bedroom, a room where I also like to work), plucked from a landscape of banality are themselves banal. There is a conflict when they expect me to be too.

Meet women in art galleries. Meet women in book shops. Done that. The problem persists. A woman who can discuss Almodovar films rather than Pitbull’s music is still a consumer. She doesn’t necessarily do anything either.

If you are someone who does something — that is, gets up every day and chips away at  project that might change your life, be it writing, blogging, fitness, or business — then you are rare, because most other people — and most women — aren’t. Worse, there is a tendency, I think, for aimless people to try to slow you down, to bring you down to their level. Perhaps this is because they are aware, and ashamed, of their own inactivity.

For me, this makes even short-term intimacies with women problematic. Novels don’t write themselves. As appealing as a lazy weekend may be for many, for me it is an anathema. I have to work.

To find out how to pull hot girls day or night buy my book The 7 Laws of Seduction

For daily updates follow me on Twitter  and Instagram

Read More: Good Girls And Bad Girls Are The Same Girls 

About the author


Troy is a game veteran of a decade's standing, and a lover of women, literature, travel and freedom. Follow him on Twitter here.

Zelcorpion - May 4, 2014

That is in essence the female mind for min. 95% of women. The most “active” females I know have an enormous social circle, have family or go non-stop on parties or meeting friends. There are some women who are obsessed with a topic and it consumes their day – feminism, gender, their “useless” job, rareley something more useful, but those are the exceptions.

One girl I have is into organic gardening, healthy food and nutrition and she spends 16 hours in the garden every weekend. That is a positive passion that may even become a business later on.

Most women and fewer but still a huge part of men blast away their lives on TV, alcohol and some mindless recreational activities while the rest of their free time is spent living in the frame of their women. That is why the people are so easily manipulated.

troyfrancispua - May 6, 2014

Completely agree. The girl interested in gardening sounds like she’s one of a rare breed. I once had a girlfriend who was really into athletics. I thought it would work out really well, but once we’d entered into a relationship health problems prevented her from training , and so I was stuck in the same situation – having a girlfriend with nothing to do.

People really need to realise that we only have one life and that what counts is the difference you make, not how much TV you watch/

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Hector Ochoa (@blackstalk84) - April 22, 2015

I’ve had my share of lazy’s, some losing their jobs from getting too comfortable at my house, others doing everything they could to manipulate themselves into my lifestyle and take over my relaxation areas (i.e. my couch). I know I’ve messed up a lot, but it’s actually taught me to look at the girls in my office building differently. There’s a reason I have a hard time chatting them up, it’s because they really are just that busy. I’ve now made it a point to distract them from their ‘busy’ lives, with that being the opening topic. “Long day so far?”, “Why in such a hurry?”, “You seem like a busy girl, what do you do?”. I don’t think there are enough guys asking these girls about their successes, I’ve got to look past the ‘resting bitch face’ if I want to have any chance.

Ian Wilson - December 4, 2016

From another writer (narrative nonfiction and novels), I entirely relate to your situation. I block my day out and find that I demand a certain amount of engagement from anyone with whom I spend my time. It’s tough sometimes to throttle down to a mundane level.

Your blog posts are superb and thought-provoking.

    troyfrancispua - December 4, 2016

    Thank you so much Ian – very much appreciated. The writing life is hard to reconcile with a traditional relationship

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